PRIVATE CHEF

Huge caveat here - this is probably a house-only situation. If you’re in the hotel, skip ahead to dinner. 

If not, there’s a scenario in which this is dubbed “the most underrated move of the weekend”. In theory it makes sense - letting a world class chef do their thing while the squad enjoys all that the house has to offer. This goes for a bartender as well. You’re getting an incredible meal for half the price and doing it all with a drink tab that is beyond manageable. Just tip well, please.

The sneaky best part of this whole deal is that there are usually multiple courses included and you end up filling up on appetizers because they’re electric or charcuterie because you have zero self control. And you can do it all while betting on a random Cubs/Brewers game with your ass on a 12-thousand dollar couch. 

Eventually, the chef and crew make it to the main course and everyone sits around an equally-if-not-more expensive solid oak table and digs in. Toasts are made and stories are exchanged. Something controversial is said and there’s whispers of a “who the fuck is this guy” but you power through and get ready to load up the van. Friday night in Austin, TX on deck.